Mama vs. The Mommies, Pt. 2

April 23, 2009

A couple Wednesdays ago, when Irwin and Clara were still in town, we all went to the Children’s Museum.  Clara had gone the last time she visited and wanted to introduce Irwin to the wonder of the Noodle Forest, and we’re members so Moo’s always happy to make the trip.

But we picked a day when the museum was overrun with screaming children.  I counted six school buses in the parking lot, and I couldn’t help but wonder if the museum was being greedy (not to mention unfair to their non-school-age visitors) by allowing so many school groups at once.  We could hardly move without being knocked over, which was annoying enough, and then we got trapped in the creaky old elevator, whose doors closed on Moo’s stroller as we tried to escape.

By the time we attempted to have our picnic lunch in the middle of a swarm of matching-shirted kindergarteners, I was not in the best of moods.  After lunch, we went back inside for some more playtime.  Luckily, most of the school kids had cleared out.  Moo had already been run down a few times, and I was happy we could move without fear now.  We explored the art room (art room robots!!) and then the kids wanted to go back upstairs.  So we walked out the (very large) doorway, and right at the threshold, Moo was mowed down – but not by a child, by a mother.

Moo managed to catch her balance and didn’t fall down completely, and the mother who knocked into her just swept right by without a backwards glance.

“Small child!”  I said to her back.  I said it louder than I intended, but whatever.  She’d just made my daughter the unwilling pin in her big-ass bowling game.

Moo was whimpering, so I picked her up and my mom and I started walking down the hall, when I heard a loud, “EXCUSE ME.”

I turned around and saw the woman who’d mowed down Moo stalking up to me.

“I HEARD what you said!  And I did say sorry to your kid!” she shouted at me, standing two inches away.

“Well, I didn’t hear you say that,” I stammered.  She wasn’t done.

“I have a small child myself!” she yelled, sticking her finger in my face.  (Remember, I am holding Moo this whole time.)  “I wouldn’t knock over a kid without saying sorry,” (Because saying sorry makes it okay?) “And I don’t know what kind of mother YOU ARE-”

“If you have a small child of your own, then you know what it’s like to feel very protective!” I interrupted.

“Yes I DO, and-”

“THEN WE’RE DONE!” I shouted back, stepping back and putting some space between us, because the more she yelled, the more I wanted to punch her in the face, and the more I had to struggle to remind myself that I was holding Moo and should NOT punch her in the face, and then had to struggle even MORE to remember that this was a big, big woman who could definitely kick my ass.  Also, I have never punched anybody in the face.  Always wanted to, though…

I turned my back on her and my mom and I started to escape down the hallway.  But she had one more thing to say.

“YOU’RE A TERRIBLE EXAMPLE TO YOUR DAUGHTER!” she screamed at my back.

I whirled, mouth agape, as she retreated into the art room.  I felt like she’d slapped me, and couldn’t find words to scream back at her.  So my mom did.

“YOU’RE THE ONE WHO’S A TERRIBLE EXAMPLE!” she shouted.

If you knew my mom, you’d know that this was a big deal.  She just might hate confrontation even more than I do. 

So, thanks to my mom, we had the last word.  But that didn’t stop me from bursting into tears in the stairwell (because they’d finally officially decided the elevator was broken).

My mom hugged me tightly, with poor Moo squished between us, looking terribly confused.

“Don’t you let that stupid woman make you feel this way,” she said, with just the same kind of fierce devotion I feel for my own daughter.

 So – maybe I don’t need to be best friends with all the other mothers in the world when I’ve got such a wonderful one of my very own so ready and willing to hug me and tell me I’m a good parent. 

However, I would like to be able to keep from punching all the other ones in the face.

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9 Responses to “Mama vs. The Mommies, Pt. 2”

  1. Sonia Says:

    What a great mom! Yours…and you! Moo’s a very blessed little girl to have sucha great mom like you and your so blessed to have sucha terrific mom. With that said, how’s about I go punch all the other ones in the face for you 😉 *mwah*

  2. Leslie Says:

    UGH. The inner superhero in me would like to kick that ladies arse – but YOU held your ground, were strong and didn’t stoop to her LOW level.

    You are a WONDERFUL example of a mama!

    • mamarose Says:

      Leslie – I really don’t know what would have happened if I hadn’t been holding Moo at the time. But thanks – and you’re one mom (you too Sonia!) that I can safely promise I will never punch in the face.

  3. Wordslinger for Hire Says:

    I’m buying you a billy club so you can crack evil trolls like this in the kneecaps before you punch them in the face. You are a wonderful and amazing mother (and I’m not just saying that because of who you are… I actually tell people that all the time when I am regaling them with “Moo” stories. You and Herbie are both amazing parents)

    Although I must admit that your mom is now my new hero. (Or “heroine” as the case may be… not that she is a drug… but you understand)

  4. kristi Says:

    Seriously, what gets in to people?! I should think you knock over a small child, you apologize profusely to the kid AND especially the mom. Hell.O.

  5. Leslie Says:

    I am honored to make it to the “Moms I won’t punch in the face list” 🙂

  6. pam b Says:

    first off: you are an awesome mom. that lady is smoking crack

    second: way to go for saying something! seriously, as much as you think i have a backbone, i dont. i only come up with remarks 12 hrs later when i have time to ponder and ponder. my wit is so delayed its ridiculous. i end up in situations like that with NOTHING to say.


  7. […] we found it in a trip to the Phoenix Children’s Museum with my mom.  I was nervous, because our last visit ended in tears (mine, not Moo’s), but luckily the museum wasn’t overrun by school groups […]


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