We’re All Mad Here

I think I’ve mentioned that Moo is going to be the White Rabbit for Halloween, inspired by her cousin Clara’s Alice in Wonderland dance recital – so, technically, a White Rabbit Ballerina.  Here it is in the making:

Thanks, Mom!  It’s even sparklier now that it’s almost done.

Herbie is going to be the Mad Hatter, and he has a Cat in the Hat hat which I think we can cover with colorful felt (when?), and maybe he can wear his kooky tuxedo jacket (because these are interpretive Alice in Wonderland costumes, not literal – I mean, the White Rabbit is wearing a tutu).  And I was supposed to be the Cheshire Cat, wearing this fantastic costume:

(Except with modest black tights and a leotard underneath, of course.)  It’s the exact costume the cheshire cat wore in Clara’s show, and it was $23 on Amazon on September 25.  Of course I procrastinated, and on October 15, it was $50, in extra-small only.  Unfair!

I was unwilling to wear this:

LOVE that guy.

So I made a trip to Buffalo Exchange, thinking maybe I could find something to pass off as the Cheshire Cat, or if not, Alice or the Queen of Hearts.  Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem like people wear a lot of pink-and-purple striped clothes, or if they do, they don’t want to give them away.  And people also don’t wear light blue sundresses with pretty puffed sleeves.  So I was outta luck on Alice and Cheshire Cat.  But I did find a strapless red prom dress with a black beaded overlay (not as pretty as it sounds) that I thought I could make work for the Queen of Hearts.  Maybe if I found a cape that I could cover with felt hearts?  I dug into the men’s costume section, and finally found one used vampire cape…with what I strongly suspect is a big splotch of puke.

I still bought it.  It’s been sitting in a bag for three days waiting for me to clean it, but – ew.  I mean, I am going to just cut that part off to make a shorter, jauntier cape, but I still don’t really want to touch that thing again. 

Hopefully I’ll find my courage (perhaps I left it in my rose garden, or on the croquet court) and create the perfect heart-festooned cape out of my puke-poncho.  Then all I need is a cheap crown and a heart scepter and I’m ready to rule my minions.

**I was just about to publish this when I remembered that the whole reason I wanted to write about our Halloween costumes was because we went to Dee’s Dancewear today to get Moo her first pair of ballet shoes, and they were tiny and adorable, and I immediately turned into an Annoying Mom and insisted on showing off to the store owner (Dee?) how Moo knows how to arabesque and pas de chat and I totally embarrassed myself, and so…yeah.  Tiny ballet shoes are super cute.

To Do

Moo is getting very excited for Halloween.  “I REMEMBER ABOUT ALL THE CANDY!” she told us last night.  I’m getting pretty excited too – Halloween has always been one of my favorite holidays, mostly because I love the costumes, but also – yes, all the candy!

Yesterday I told Moo that we couldn’t get out the Halloween decorations (we have quite a bit, much to Herbie’s chagrin) until our house was really, really clean.

I don’t know why the hell I said that.  Now I have to clean the damn house.  But I really, really want to get those Halloween decorations out, so I made myself a huge to-do list for today, which I am supposed to complete in less than four hours, when I have to go pick up Moo.

Wanna see?

• Vacuum (check!)
• Clean Herbie’s stinky gym clothes pile (because I am a wonderful wife) (check!)
• Water plants/water lawn/mourn dead plants/mourn dead lawn (check! well, the plants)
• Make bed (check!)
• Put away giant pile of folded clothes on top of dressers, and on the floor of the family room, and on the ironing board and dining room table (check!)
• Do dishes (figure out what to do with the oil from last night’s fish sticks…help?) (check! but not the stinky oil yet…)
• Clean Doc’s cage (check!)
• Sweep/Swiffer/mop floors (check!)
• Clean Moo’s room and playroom (should make her do this herself, but oh well) (check!)
• Clean bathroom, ugh (check!)
• Organize under bathroom sink, clean out and recycle all those bottles of lotion that only have three squirts left)
• Reorganize hall closet (Random tiny terra cotta pots, it’s time for you to go.  You’re safe, giant dangly spider.) (check!)
• Sort through giant pile of mail and magazines
• Repaint entire house

Ready….go!

Okay…..GO!

Aaaaaand….now!  Go!

1 2 3….GO GO GO!

See You On Thursday

As of this post, I am taking a self-imposed 48-hour blog hiatus.  Last night at 1:00 a.m., as I clicked away on the computer and my sleeping husband lay lonely in bed, I suddenly realized a few things – I’ve been neglecting my husband, I’ve been neglecting my friends, I’m behind on my daughter’s checkups, our house is still completely decked out for Halloween, my office still looks like this, I promised myself two months ago that I’d buy us a new oven before Thanksgiving so I could bake holiday goodies, and now Thanksgiving is a week away, I’ve had a present for our friends’ new baby sitting on the counter for a month and haven’t mailed it, we have camping stuff still laying out from last July… well, you get the idea.

Time to tidy-up a bit.

Pre-Halloween To-Do List

1.  Wake up early, shower and get ready
2.  In shower, figure out costumes for Herbie and I
3.  Drop off Moo at my mom’s house by 9:00 a.m.
4.  Stop by Michael’s to get feathers for Moo’s Caa costume cap
5.  Fresh & Easy – dinner
6.  Back home by 11 to clean, do five loads of laundry, and carve three pumpkins.
7.  Pick up Moo at 3:00 p.m. and enlist mom to help me make Moo’s Caa cap.
8.  Somewhere in there, dye tights yellow for parrot legs.

How it all actually went down:

Woke up at 9:15, sat Moo in front of Caillou (Halloween episode, yay!), threw on clothes and brushed teeth.  Dropped off Moo at my mom’s house at 10:30, had a tea party and discussed costume options until 11:45.  Oops.  First stop:  Target.  Figured out Halloween costumes – Since Moo is Caa, Herbie and I will round out her stuffed animal entourage and go as Turtle (Herbie) and Hop (me).  Spent an hour roaming Target, searching for turtle shell possibilities and something fluffy for me.  Ooh look, Christmas decorations! …Finally came up with fleece vest and garbage can lid.  Turned out they wouldn’t let me buy just the lid, even after explaining to the manager how cute it’s going to be when we’re all dressed up as Moo’s favorite animals, but Target is lacking in Halloween spirit and makes me buy the whole garbage can.

Then on to Michael’s; spent another hour trying to find the perfect feathers, deciding on green spray paint (latex? glitter? metallic? eek), and vascillating between the 2-inch and 3-inch yellow ribbon.  Afterwards, decided to stop at Walgreen’s since husband keeps bugging me because apparently he cannot POSSIBLY be a turtle unless his head is entirely green – procured green face makeup AND green eye pencil at Walgreen’s – internally declared myself Awesome Wife.  While I was at it, grabbed some black eye pencil and pink lipstick for a bunny nose and whiskers.  Then on to Fresh & Easy – orange chicken, broccoli – voila! Dinner.  Oh, and maybe some cinnamon rolls, we probably need more wine, and perhaps they carry that brand of hummus we discovered in Seattle?  Got in the car and realized it was 2:30, I was supposed to pick up Moo in 30 minutes, and I hadn’t even taken a shower, let alone started one load of laundry.

Damn.

Pumpkins and Witches

I adore Halloween – it might be my favorite holiday.  I always hoped to be the family who threw a big Halloween bash at their house every year, like our friends Larry and Maria did until their kids decided they were too cool for Halloween (damn teenagers!).  But we’re not quite at a Halloween big-bash place in our lives, so until we are, I content myself with Halloween decorations.  Last year I went a little nuts looking up Halloween crafts and spent many hours crafting spooky paper bag trees and salt-dough ghosts.  I must admit I’m a little bummed that this year, my rehearsal-heavy nights mean no new Halloween crafts.  Luckily, most of last year’s crafts survived, although the salt-dough ghosts now look more burnished-brown than spooky-white.

My piece-de-resistance (what does that mean, anyway?) would have to be the tree in Moo’s room.  Moo has a bird-themed bedroom, complete with a beautiful tree my mom painted that fills up one wall.  Last year, I decided that the birdies residing in Moo’s wall-tree needed to join in the festivities. 

And so:

 

Yep, the birds have costumes.  And of course, they also have pilgrim hats, Santa hats and birthday party hats.  This year I’m determined to add bunny ears for Easter.

I also had jack-o-lanterns in the “grass” along the floorboards last year, but this year Moo would rip them right off and have them for lunch, so she wisely suggested that the pumpkins might like to keep the birdies company.  Good idea, Moo!

I’m trying to cherish every moment of the Halloween season this year.  In Moo’s world right now, pumpkin-spotting and birdies wearing witch hats are all she needs to send her flying over the moon, like a little bald baby-witch.  “Candy” is just something that weird singing pumpkin warbles about at the craft store Mommy always goes to.  By next year, candy fever could hit, so I’m milking her pumpkin-love for all I can.

We’re even going to start a new tradition this year – we’re introducing the Great Pumpkin.  If you haven’t heard, the Great Pumpkin comes the night after Halloween, see, and if you light your jack o’lantern and leave a candy offering, the Great Pumpkin will take the candy and leave you a special present in return.  Then he brings the candy to all the candyless chidren in the world.  Herbie’s mom thinks there’s no way Moo will buy this, but she forgets that this is a little girl who wakes up from her nap and proceeds to discuss her plans for the afternoon with the birdies and pumpkins in her wall-tree.

We’re keeping the dream alive, Linus!

Point n’ Shoot

Herbie gave me a new camera for our anniversary!

I gave Herbie a couple t-shirts.

Yikes.

I mean, they’re cool t-shirts, and he says he loves them, but – a new camera!  Geez-Louise!  The flash on our old camera made Moo look like some sort of tragic, white-fleshed moon-baby, so this is a wonderful gift.  I’ve been playing with it all day – here’s a series I call, “Pumpkin Cookie.”  Behold:  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Accidental Nap

Is there any worse feeling than taking a small snooze in the evening, then waking up and realizing it’s midnight and you just slept almost four hours?

Well, yes, there are probably worse feelings.

But I’m still feeling miserable, even though Herbie keeps hugging me and reassuring me that it’s just fiiiine that I didn’t do any laundry, work on my blog, sweep the floors, decorate the house for Halloween, or talk to him.

And now it’s 2 a.m., Herbie is trying to stay awake to keep me company, and I am probably going to polish off this pint of Haagen Dazs before 3 a.m. hits.

Sigh.

I hope Herbie doesn’t ask for any of my ice cream.

Just for Fun…

Here’s Moo on Thursday night – she was shocked, simply SHOCKED that Sarah Palin answered all of the questions (mostly) intelligibly during the debate.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh yeah, and she’s wearing Mommy’s awesome Halloween socks.

More Kleenex

Moo is sick AGAIN.

Wasn’t she just sick like a week ago?

Any moms out there want to make me feel better out this?  I swear I’m not letting her lick shopping carts.  I just can’t help thinking that maybe if I’d nursed her longer, she wouldn’t get colds so often.  Or maybe it’s because our house is so messy.  Maybe I don’t wash her hands enough.  Or maybe it’s just in the genes – her cousins get colds all the time too.  Anybody else’s kids get colds this often?

Sigh.  Maybe it’s all of those reasons.  I just feel like a terrible mother when hardly two weeks go by and here I am mopping up her sneezes again.

Trying to cheer ourselves up, Moo and I went to Michael’s, where I could keep her germs somewhat contained in the cart, and looked at pumpkins.  Her pumpkin-joy, even in the midst of stuffed-up misery, is contagious.  I find it fascinating, though, how she’s just inherently afraid of skeletons and ghosts.  If we strayed too close to a scary display, she’d grab my sleeve and shout, “Mommy! Mommy!” until I steered us to a safe distance.  We’re fans of cute Halloween in our house.  We even bought a cutesy scarecrow wearing a dress that might make Herbie throw up.  I try to keep the cutesy to a minimum for Herbie’s sake, but how could I resist?  It was on sale for $4.99, and Moo greeted it with, “Hi Scarecrow!  Happy Hayooweeeen!”  Sold.

So I guess yet another cold isn’t the end of the world.  But those red-rimmed eyes make me feel so guilty.

Sorry, little Moo.

And, moms?  If you visit the Paradise Valley Michael’s, you might want to wipe down your shopping cart.  Oops.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Try not to throw up at work, Herbie!

Weekend Stats

Rattlesnakes Avoided:  1 (Look out, Herbie!)

Spanish Words Learned by Moo:  1 – “Ovejita” (little lamb)  Thanks, Sesame Street.

Peas That Went Into Moo’s Mouth:  7

Peas Spit Out: 2

Peas Found Later Smushed on Computer Keyboard: 3

Approximate Number of Halloween Pumpkins in Target:  537

Cost of Stolen Nailpolish:  $5.25

Herbie’s Opinion on Sex and The City Movie’s Sex Scenes:  “Too well-lit”  (I agree.  Who has sex in bright light?  NOBODY.  And if you do, I find you extremely annoying.)