Congratulations, Colin!

Perhaps someday he really will buy me a $3 bottle of Coors Light….a girl can dream.

Every Little Thing (Self-Indulgent Video Alert!)

Happy Birthday Moo!.

Weekend

Our weekend started with another hike/stroll…

We paused to ask a lady to take our picture, who asked me, “When are you due?”  “June,” I replied.  “Me too!” she said.

I never would have even guessed she was pregnant.  She handed us back our camera and jogged away, pushing three kids in stroller.  Her other two were just up ahead.

I should take up jogging.

This is that fleeting time of year in Phoenix, where everything is lush and warm and breezy, and you’d better cherish every second, because suddenly, WHAMMO! 100 degrees.  But not on Saturday.  Saturday almost convinced me I like hiking in the desert.  But it won’t last.

Saturday night, Herbie went out with his friend to see the movie “Evil Dead” in the theater, which is apparently something to get really excited about, if you are a guy, and a nerd.  After I got Moo to bed, I watched “He’s Just Not That Into You,” which is one of those movies perfect for watching by yourself at home, if you are a woman, and a nerd.  I’ll admit it, Ben Affleck made me cry, and also I am completely captivated by Scarlett Johansson’s breasts.

Sunday we went to the Chandler Ostrich Festival.  Herbie and I went once before Moo was born and have been trying to get back ever since.  It has gotten a lot bigger since 2006, and although we tried to get our zen attitudes going, there were a LOT of people, and nothing annoys me more than when people won’t let me pass even though I am pregnant AND carrying a toddler.    Also, it quickly became clear that Moo was coming down with a cold.

Luckily, there were goats and ostriches to cheer us up.

Here are three ostriches, just after bucking off their riders in the ostrich race.  I love how they all have their beaks open, like just maybe they’re going to leap the fence and start pecking out eyeballs.  They have a delightful combination of menacing and ridiculous. 

Herbie convinced Moo that ostriches say, “dirka dirka dirka,” so she’s been meandering around the house the last couple days, sniffling and muttering, “dirka dirka” to herself.

The rest of the weekend passed in a blur of boogers.  But Sunday night, I also got to spend some time with a friend that I haven’t seen in a few months, and she’s having surgery today, so everybody take a second and send some good wishes her way, okay?

Whoa, What’s that Kicking Inside My Stomach?

We went for another hike on Saturday, and as we made our way from the trailhead, right next to Moo’s hopefully-preschool, to AJ’s and Starbucks, I had a genius idea.

Mama:  “Hey!!  If Moo gets into the preschool, I could drop her off and then hike over to Starbucks!”

Herbie:  “Good idea!”

Mama:  “I could have coffee and read or write for a couple hours, and then hike back and pick her up!”

Herbie:  “That is GREAT.  Just one question – where is the baby during this time?”

Good God.  I COMPLETELY forgot I was pregnant.

Next Let’s Discuss the Meaning of Life…

At California Pizza Kitchen yesterday, after Herbie had to go back to work and Moo and I remained, sipping at our bendy straws, Moo looked up at me and asked, “Why are you my Mommy and Daddy?”

Mama:  “Uhhhhh, because we love you.  And because we made you!”

Moo:  “Daddy didn’t make me!  YOU made me, Mommy.”

Mama:  “Well, Daddy helped.”

Moo:  “How did he help?”

Mama:  (Okay, don’t panic!  Are we really discussing how babies are made?  You’re supposed to just be straight with them, right?  Penis, vagina, sperm!  Wait, she’s not even three…) “….Well, he…um…just helped you grow!”

Moo:  “He just pushed me right up there?”

Mama:  “….Yes.  Exactly.”

Olympic-Sized Lessons

Almost every morning for the past week, Moo and I have thrown a blanket in front of the TV and had a “breakfast picnic” while watching Olympics footage that I recorded the night before.  It’s become the highlight of my day, maybe our day.  I had no idea she’d be so enthused about snowboarding and gold medals, and I had no idea the Olympics would have so many lessons to offer my toddler.

Lessons Moo Has Learned From the Olympics:

*  If you fall down, get back up.

*  Girls can do anything boys can do.

*  It’s nice to have a coach (or a mommy and daddy) to give you a hug after you’ve tried something really hard.

*  If you become an Olympic figure skater, people will throw free stuffed animals at you.

*  There are lots of different kinds of people from all over the world who look different than we do.

*  If you practice very,very hard for a long, long time, you can do amazing things.

And my favorite observation thus far – Moo on Johnny Weir:  “Ooooh, he’s a FANCY man!”

Indeed.  And the joy of getting fancy is a lesson Moo already has down.

Lemonade, Lemonade

We picked up Moo this morning after a sleepover at Nana and Gramps’ house (so we could finally see Avatar last night – Wow!  Yowza!  And yet, I think I still liked Star Trek and District 9 better…)  We drove home the long way, through the neighborhood where we hope to live by the time Moo starts kindergarten, and as we drove by her hopefully-one-day school, three kids appeared on the sidewalk, holding signs and yelling.

“Lemonade!  Lemonade!  Just like Grandma made!”  one boy shouted, while another waved a sign that read, “All money goes to Haiti.”

Of course we stopped.  And paid a little extra for the good cause.

But we’d like to do something a little bit more than just buy three cups of lemonade (those kids have a  great mom, I think).  So I’m wondering where others have donated, and if anyone has any advice.  There are so many places to donate, I don’t know which one to pick.  We want one where, hopefully, all the money will go directly to help Haitians.  I’d love some suggestions!

“And My Lawyer, And My Agent, And GOD…”

So here’s what I said after winning last night:

“Thank you so much!  I want to thank everyone at Desert Foothills, especially Meribeth and all the wonderful volunteers, my incredible cast, and Mary who I love so much even though I’ve only known her a few months – I’ve loved her choreography for so long, watching Sound of Music and Mary Poppins over and over again, it’s like I’ve loved her my whole life.  Thank you to my husband for supporting me, pushing me, making me laugh (and all the massages), and to my family and friends.  And I just have to tell you a quick story - I studied theatre, went to New York and did the whole thing, and was too chicken to ever go to a single audition.  And then I got to a certain age and thought, “Really? I’m just going to be a big chicken my whole life?”  And so I gave myself six months to get cast in ANY show, and one year later, here I am winning this award, and that is CRAZY.  And I don’t know why I was so scared of all you people, because I couldn’t have been more warmly welcomed.  I am truly honored to be a part of such a kooky, dysfunctional, deeply talented family of actors and artists.  Thank you!”

Isn’t that a good speech?

Yeah, I didn’t win.

And I really wasn’t expecting to (the award went to an actress from Nearly Naked’s “Blood Brothers” with a formidable voice and the most intimidating bosom I’ve ever seen), and the only reason I was hoping to win was because it would just make such a great ending to my story.  But I’m quite content to hold off on giving my story an ending at all.  I’m hoping there’s still a lot more adventure to come.

But isn’t that a good speech?!

Oscar Night! Um, I Mean Zoni Night!

I think I’ve possibly built this night up in my head a little too much.  I mean, I’ve been studying pictures of celebrities on the red carpet, as if there are going to be pictures of me in People magazine tomorrow.

Get a grip, Mama!  …No, I don’t want to!

Hair – check!  Jewelry from Mom – check!  Moo safely ensconced with Nana and Grandpa, playing “Dinosaur Train” – check!   Bad, amateur French manicure as applied by Mama Rose – check!  Tic-Tacs – check!  Now to play with eyeliner and try to find the perfect pair of underwear.  Why did I not buy Spanx??

Can’t wait to see Neil Patrick Harris tonight!

Oh, wait…

Getting it Together

So I’ve got the dress:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I’ve got the shoes (but gold):

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I’ve got my grammie’s awesome jade cocktail ring, my mom’s gorgeous gold bracelets (I think she might hire a security guard to follow me around all night), and her vintage purse, and new earrings from Nordstrom.

I’ve also got a handsome date with a new shirt and tie.  (Mama:  “Everything is purple.”  Herbie:  “No!  No purple.  Can’t you get me a more manly color?”  Mama:  “I”m telling you, everything is purple.  Purple is cool right now.”  Herbie:  “Well, as long as it’s a manly purple.”)

I think I’m ready for Monday!